Do You Mean Marine Biologist?

I thought working in TN would be a lot different than Chicago. I understood that in a large city like that, I was going to get crazy and mean people. However, people are much more polite down south, so I thought the worse I would get was snooty Brentwood moms that were too worried about their calorie intake and giant SUVs to remember what "please" and "thank you" meant. While I do see several of these women daily, I also manage to get the occasional whack job in there as well.

The other day I was at the stand and this guy walked out of the shoe store to get some coffee. He was in a military uniform, though I'm not sure WHY he was wearing it in the mall. He ordered his drink, and while I made it he had a very...interesting conversation with me and the other girl that was working with me.

"So. Has anyone ever approached you two about joining the marines?"

"Um, no, I can't say they have."

"You look like you could kick some butt...how old are you guys? 16?"

I laughed at this. I had my hair in pigtails, but I certainly don't think I look like a sixteen year old.

I'm VERY good at avoiding eye contact when I think something is getting awkward, so I sorta ducked behind the espresso machine while I made the drink and left the other girl to deal with him. They talked a bit, and she informed him that she was 25, married, and wanted to start a family. The marines were not for her.

"What about you, Harry Potter? You ever thought about being a marine?"

Ok. I had my Harry Potter shirt on. I'll have you know that I got a compliment from every fourteen year old that came by! He laughed SO HARD after he said the Harry Potter thing. Harry Potter came out when I was ten...it's been a big part of my life. I saw no shame in wearing that shirt!

"Yeah, I don't think I'd be a good marine."

"Why?"

I wanted to tell him that I didn't support an institution that insisted gay people hide and that I thought the war was pointless. I also refuse to shoot/hold a gun. Ever. Rainbows and peace, man. However, I didn't say that.

"I'm not very brave. In fact...I'm kind of scared of everything. The marines wouldn't want that."

"Oh, but we could make you brave. A bit of training would be good for you."

"...Yeaaaah...no. Here's your coffee."

He continued to spout about how AWESOME being a marine was. I mean, if being a marine means walking around the mall with a latte and talking to random people, I GUESS I could do that. I prefer theatre.

On a side note...what do the marines even DO? I know what the Navy does. I know what the Air Force does. I know what the ARMY does. But...what are marines for? Mall security?